Foster Care Institute Dr. John DeGarmo
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Welcoming your Child from Foster Care into your House.

10/21/2021

12 Comments

 
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The first impression you create with your foster child is often vitally important to how the next few days and weeks will transpire. This will probably not be the sweet little child who rushes into your waiting arms, laughing delightfully, as you might imagine. It is highly likely that your foster child will be scared and frightened, full of anxiety. He may have left his family moments ago, and is now told that you are his family, for the time being. Without a doubt, he is full of questions, as emotions swirl within him. No matter how much this child has been abused, whether it is physically or emotionally, your foster child will want to their mother and father back. After all, these people have been the most important people in his life. Along with this, he has lost his familiar pattern of living, his home, his friends, and all that made up his own personal world. Although it is impossible to predict how he will react when he first meets you, it is important that you approach this time with caution and care.

Each child’s placement is different. Some may come to you with a head full of lice, while some might be some might be covered in dirt, and the few possessions they own, if any, carried in a black plastic bag. In fact, they may only have the clothes on their back. Others may come to stay with you clean, healthy, and with a suitcase full of clothing, a box of possessions, and some money in their wallet. What is important is that you do not judge your foster child based on his arrival and appearance. However they arrive, they will need your patience, your time, and your love.


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When the caseworker pulls into your driveway, if possible, go out to the car and welcome the caseworker and child, introducing yourself immediately, with a warm smile and soft voice. Inform your foster child who you are and the role you will now play in his life. He may very well not understand the foster care system, or what foster parents do. Do not insist that your new child call you mom or dad. In fact, it is wise that you never insist upon this. The word “mom” may refer to the person who beat him. “Dad” may be the person who left his family. Allow your foster child to call you by your first names, if you feel comfortable with this, or by whatever name he feels comfortable in calling you. As the child may be scared, do not insist that he react to you right away. This is a time of extreme difficulty, and your foster child may be in a state of shock. As you help him inside with his possessions, take him by the hand, if he is a little one, or place a soft hand upon his shoulder, if he is a teenager. Actions like these can be reassuring that all will be okay, that he is in a safe and caring home. Do not insist upon hugging, as he may be too embarrassed or hurt to do so.

After all introductions to the entire family have been made, take him on a tour of your house, his new home. Show him where he will sleep, and where his clothes will be kept. Have a nightlight already on in the room, if the room is dark. The smell of freshly baked chocolate chip cookies is always a welcome one in any home, particularly for children. Ask if he is hungry, and offer him some food. If he doesn’t want any food, do not insist upon it. He will eat when he is ready and hungry.


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You will have to sign some paper work with your caseworker, as well as go over any last minute news, details, and information. If possible, do this away from the child, as this, too, can be especially embarrassing and damaging to your new child. This is a good time for your foster child to eat, or be alone in his new room. If you have children of your own, it may also be a good time for them to engage in some sort of play with their new foster brother. Your foster child will likely be overwhelmed with the situation, so it is important that you make sure your home is as peaceful and quiet as possible. When it comes to establishing family rules, you can put that aside the next few days.

​ Do not invite the neighbors or relatives over upon arrival. Instead, allow your foster child to have some personal space and alone time. If it is late at night, do not insist that he go to bed immediately. After all, he is probably not only needing some time to reflect on the day’s events, sleep may be difficult to come by, as he is in a strange bed, in a strange home. Sadly, it is not uncommon for newly placed foster children to cry themselves to sleep during the first few nights. Do not be surprised if this happens. He may be scared and lonely. Let him know that you understand how difficult it is for him, and that his tears are normal and all right. Read to him a bedtime story each night; place a nightlight not only in his room, but in the nearby bathroom, as well. Let him know that he can get up in the night and use the bathroom whenever he needs to.


-Dr. John
​
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12 Comments
Walter George
10/29/2021 11:59:17 am

Hello everyone, my name is Walter George I am so overwhelmed with joy all thanks to Dr. Wale spell. My Wife  left me for another man a few years back and I was very devastated because I never did anything wrong to her, I was left with my two kids and a job that pays little. I was almost giving up until I saw a testimony online about Dr. Wale and I decided to contact him. I explained my problem to him and he assured me I'll see a positive result after 24 hours, surprisingly my Wife came back the day after the spell begging me to forgive her and promised to never leave. My Wife has been back for 6 months now and we've never had any issues, am glad I didn't doubt Dr. Wale cause he sure can solve any problems with fast relief you can also contact him for help now WhatsApp/Text him: +1(978) 406-9575 or Email him at [email protected]

Reply
Mariam Robert
2/11/2022 05:14:05 pm

I want to share my wonderful testimony how I got back my husband back, who I sworn ever to be with until when he left me to another woman for no reason and I try to make things work for both of us yet things were getting worse and I love him so much and there is nothing I could do to get my husband back until I saw a testimony share by a woman called Lauren from Australia on the internet talking about a powerful spell caster who brought her husband back within 24 hours and I decide to give it a try and to my greatest surprise he also did it for me just as he did for Lauren and I have a lot of people complaining of fake spell caster but this one I met was a real spell caster who help me to solve my problem I have no solution to, I introduce many of my best friends that have a similar problems, and their problem were solve with the great help of DR Jumba, who help them to get back their lovers within 24 hours. I am so happy that my husband is back to me again, and the most surprising thing is that our love is very strong, every day is happiness and joy. and There is nothing like being with the man you love. I am so happy my love is back to me with the help of DR Jumba . if you have similar problem I will advise you to contact him ,he is there to help you and put a smile on your face as he did to me and others you can also WhatsApp him +1(908) 517-4108 or Email him at : [email protected] or view his website for more review https://drjumbaspellhome.wordpress.com

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Dale McEwen
10/8/2022 03:51:35 pm

I’ve been playing the lottery since I was 18, the highest amount I've ever won is $500 and I decided to get help online on how to win the lottery massively. I met Dr Amber who gives out numbers to win the lottery with his spells. I communicated with him and he told me what I needed to know about how the spell will be done for me and I accepted. After 72 hours, he gave me the numbers and instructed me on how to play the lottery. I was shocked when I was notified that I had won $70,000,000 in the lottery and I couldn't believe my eyes thinking I was dreaming but it was all real and happening. Getting rich is never by luck, it's something we all have to work for, people have been playing the lottery for years and have never won. If you want to win big, I advise you to talk to Dr Amber and let him guide you on what to do. Here are his contact information's Phone Number: +18084815132, Email: [email protected] or check his website for his WhatsApp Number.... amberlottotemple.com

Reply
Manuel Franco
10/12/2023 02:42:38 am

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Maria Schaeffler
8/21/2024 02:49:06 am

I feel so blessed again in my marriage after Doctor Oku brought back my husband that separated with me for a good 3 months. Even though I have mouths all over my body, it won't be enough to thank Doctor Oku for his help in my life. My husband separated with me for 3 months and has been in pain and agony without him. So, I searched for help everywhere but nothing worked out, not until I meant Doctor Oku who I contacted online. I explained my situation to him and he promised that my husband will get back to me within 48 to 72 hours as long as my heart still beats for him. I believed in him and he prepared a spell for me and my husband called me exactly when Doctor Oku said. He pleaded and said he needs me back and now we are living happily again for the past 9 months. Everyone out there reading my article that needs help should contact him... Email: [email protected] or whatsApp him +2347053113465

Reply
Matthew
9/6/2024 07:50:45 am

My wife and I have been married for about 7 yrs now. We were happily married with two kids, a boy and a girl. 3 months ago, I started to notice some strange behavior from her and a few weeks later I found out that my wife is seeing someone else. She started coming home late from work, she hardly cares about me or the kids anymore, Sometimes she goes out and doesn't even come back home for about 2-3 days. I did all I could to rectify this problem but all to no avail, I became very worried and needed help. As I was browsing through the internet one day, I came across a website that suggested that Dr. Odunga can help solve marital problems, restore broken relationships and He can also cure diseases like HIV, AIDS, Herpes Virus, Cancer, E.T.C.. So, I felt I should give him a try. I contacted him and told him my problems and he told me what to do and I did it and he did a spell for me. 28 hours later, my wife came to me and apologized for the wrongs she did and promised never to do it again. Ever since then, everything has returned back to normal. My family and I are living together happily again. All thanks to Dr. Odunga. If you have any problem contact him and I guarantee you that he will help you. He will not disappoint you.
Email him at : [email protected] or contact him via Whats App +2348167159012.

Reply
navneet
1/22/2025 02:33:51 am

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imonitie blessing
1/23/2025 12:42:35 pm

I'm so happy to have my lover back again after 2 month which we where separated. I never thought we will live a happy, life together again, but today I am glad for what Dr Oseremenspell did for me, here's your solution Home if you need any help also" in your marriage /relationship message him on what'spp or email 08153622587 [email protected]

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Lizzy
4/28/2025 10:42:46 am

My relationship was restored and my lover who left me 2 yrs ago finally came back to me and apologized for all the wrongs he did and promise never to do it again, ever since then my broken relationship was restored back to normal. Thank you so much Dr Ogudugu for saving my relationship, are you facing any issue in your relationship? contact [email protected] or whatsapp him on +2348163026536 to get a healthy relationship THANK YOU

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Wendy Gunn
5/16/2025 05:01:17 am

LORD MEDUZA IS THE BEST SPELL CASTER ONLINE

It's an honor to share my testimony with the world. You merit all the accolades that mention you. Lord Meduza has been a gift to me since our meeting online. He is the only one that knows everything about creating spells. I adore him immensely for his kindness, compassion, integrity, and the support he offers to everyone who interacts with him. Without Lord Meduza, I wouldn’t have survived this difficult situation. His magic turned me into a Lottery winner of £177 Million Pounds, transforming my entire life into something beautiful and extraordinary. The numbers he provided for the lottery were transformative, elevating me from grass to grace, and I want to express my eternal gratitude to him. Thank you, sir, for being a source of help to those in need. Anyone who reads this article and requires assistance can reach him through his Email: [email protected] or WhatsApp +18079072687 as he is unmatched in crafting spells.

Reply
Tamino jax PERRY
5/23/2025 12:46:55 pm

Cancer, can be treated and cured permanently but only few believe it,, but I was among those who never believed it until doctor herbal cured me of Cancer, I had Cancer for two years and it was eating me one day I found a testimony of someone testifying to the great work of Dr Moses Buba who cured him of Cancer, I was thinking since this man can cure Cancer then . must be able to cure my Cancer too and to my greatest surprise he really cured me of Cancer, I only message him on his email( [email protected] ) and he replied me and we discussed then he sent me the medicine and today am Cancer free... All thanks to you Dr Moses Buba the herbalist.. Thank you. Contact Dr Moses Buba for any help
https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61559577240930

Reply
Shanika Stewart
7/17/2025 07:47:25 pm


You can get your Ex Back and cure your Infertility with Chief Dr. Odunga.

When I met Chief Dr. Odunga, my husband had divorced me for over 2 years because I was infertile. I was devastated and confused as a woman of 41 years of age to be a barren woman. I went online to look for help on how to get my marriage back then I met Chief Dr. Odunga. Within 48 hours of contacting him, my ex husband came back home and pleaded for me to forgive him and take him back. I knew the spell had worked. I accepted his apologies and then told Chief Dr. Odunga of my bareness for him to help me. He sent me the herbs for fertility and after 2 days of completing the treatment, I did it with my husband and immediately I conceived and became pregnant. 9 months later, I gave birth to twins.
Presently, I am a mother of two beautiful children, a boy and a girl and I am very happy in my marriage. I would recommend him to anyone because I trust he has the power and ability to help you too. I give all the praise to God for leading me to Chief Dr. Odunga and his wonderful work. Contact Chief Dr. Odunga Via Whats-App number +2348167159012. Email him at: [email protected] / [email protected]

Reply



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    AUTHOR
    Dr. John DeGarmo is the founder and director of The Foster Care Institute, and is recognized as a leading expert in foster care. Dr. John is an TEDX Talk speaker, international trainer and speaker, consultant, author, and most importantly, a father.  He has been a foster parent  with over 60 children who have come to live in his home from adoption and foster care. He is the author of many books, including the  book  
    The Foster Care Survival Guide: The Essential Book for Today's Foster Parents.

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